So . . . I loved Mass Effect: Andromeda!
Yes, I am a hardcore fan of the Mass Effect trilogy. Yes, I played them to the end three times. No, I didn’t hate the ending enough to let it ruin the rest of the games.
So, what? I’m reviewing video games now? No, I’m not, but this is a series I love dearly, and I’m sick and tired of seeing the one-sided arguments laid out against it. This isn’t a review of Andromeda, but a quick argument that it was a decent game. At the very least. it didn’t deserve to end up on so many worst games of 2017 lists. I’ll briefly touch upon the hate 3 got before moving on to Andromeda. If I vanish suddenly and without a trace, a crazy Mass Effect Zealot did it! Also: If the statement above render my opinion useless to you, you’re a giant tool, but I understand. (I really don’t, but whatever.)
The unending waves of hate:
Wubba lubba dub dub! I saw this video, and was immediately reminded of my own experiences with the Mass Effect series. I’ve had people come up to me in the streets because of my . . . fashion choice. I bought the jacket you see in the picture below because:
A) I love me some Mass Effect.
B) I was doing a new playthrough of the entire trilogy (femshep represent!) and couldn’t for the life of me get over how awesome these games are.
C) And this is the most important bit: The black and red design and the N7 logo are among the coolest looking uniform/armor/costume things I have ever seen. I probably would’ve bought an N7 item without even knowing about Mass Effect if I saw it at the store.
But I digress: What I’m trying to say is that the hate is completely off the charts on this one. I’m fine being greeted with ‘Commander,’ or ‘Shepard,’ (who on earth wouldn’t be?) when I pass someone on the street. But when I’m stopped and almost asked to explain myself, or asked whether I bought the jacket before or after playing Mass Effect 3, that’s bordering on harassment. I don’t want to have a discussion, drunken or sober, with someone screaming in my face about crayons and kindergartners, color choice and what huge pieces of shit the people at Bioware are. (This happened, by the way, step by step.)
‘This is my favorite jacket on the citadel.’
I’ll be quick and blunt. I have ‘unique’ parents. They’re negative, angry, semi-drunks who always put themselves first. I didn’t exactly grow up in a broken home, but my childhood was pretty fucked up because of those two. If I were to vent about my parents though, it wouldn’t fit in a blog post. That’s why I’ve tried to narrow it down to make it a little general and relatable to others. So here it is; five things that I wish my parents would always keep in mind:
Yes, I am smarter than you. No, I’m not trying to rub it in your faces.
When I use words like insinuate, retroactive and arbitrary, I’m not trying to show off. I’m trying to have a normal conversation with you. People I know use those words all the time. They’re not difficult words! When you stop the entire conversation to point out that I’m ‘one-upping’ you with my ‘fancy words’, I don’t want to talk to you anymore. For fuck’s sake, I’m your son! I’m supposed to reach higher and go further. It’s not my fault you got stuck in life and hate everything. Every time I argue against you, you hit me with that shit! Want me to agree with you? Stop preaching blind hatred for everything that moves!